Does anyone know....??

Does anyone know why when things appear to be improving they will suddenly crash? Or, why the light at the end of the tunnel invariably becomes an optical illusion? It seems that every time I get close to something job wise, it gets snatched away or moved further with more hoops to jump through before I get an answer. I'm all for making sure you are hiring the right person - one who is qualified and will be able to do the job - however, when it seems to take forever, that is a bit of overkill. Why have people in for second interviews AFTER sending them to HR to discuss benefits? When did this begin to be the norm? I really don't care about the benefits until after I get the job. I mean, I certainly want health insurance and such, but I really don't need to know about it until after I am hired. At this point, I am focused more on the job and how I can be productive in it. Let me start working and then we can talk about benefits.

It's been a while

Well, it has been a while since my last post. Although things have improved on the job front, I am still looking for that elusive full time position. I am currently working part time and although it helps, I still am not bringing in enough money to meet the bills.
I am still playing one against the other with the car payment and the rent. I am down to owing less than $1500 on the car, but the rent is behind a month and a half. That should be down to a month shortly as I get a check soon. The car folks are still threatening to repossess and the apartment folk are talking about eviction. I often find myself wishing that I could just get $4000 to pay everything off and bring me to an even playing field. To some people that seems like a small amount of money, but to some it is more than is imaginable.
With this, I again hope to send word out to the cosmos that I am still hoping for some assistance. Giving up is not in my nature.

Some things just aren't meant to be..

Well, last post, I was filing for bankruptcy. However, I haven't. It seems that the cost of bankruptcy is more than I can afford. Guess that just wasn't meant to happen for me. So, here I am, still trying to get money together to pay my bills, still trying to find work and still trying to save my car. I have some help coming soon, I just hope I can forestall everyone until midweek, when I should be able to set things straight.
On the job front, I had a great round of interviews for a fantastic position and I am still waiting to hear a decision. I was one of three candidates who made the final round of interviews, so I have a one-in-three chance of getting the position. Here's keeping my fingers crossed.
On a more personal note, I have been thinking a lot about old friends and trying to locate some of them online. Haven't been very successful yet, but still hoping. I have been having some very vivid dreams, and while I know that that is just my mind wandering, I can't help but wonder if it is fueling this search.
Well, more ramblings on that another time......

Bankruptcy??

I tried to avoid this for as long as possible, but now it seems as if it is the only option left to me. I am going to see an attorney tomorrow to check into filing for bankruptcy.
I hate to do this. It is against everything I have ever felt. I had been involved in one before (against my will) but it was my ex's doing.
I see no other choices at this point.
All because I need about $2000 to get things caught up. Everyone seems to want everything now and I just don't have it now.
I have been looking for work, but whether it is my old boss' doing or the economy, nothing has come through.

Thoughts to the cosmos

I firmly believe that sending out good thoughts brings back good thoughts in return. That is why I have always tried in whatever way I could to help those that need help. I have given money, time, a helping hand, a listening ear - pretty much whatever was needed, whenever I could.
Now I am the one in need. I need to get some money quickly - like within the next 24 hours - in order to pay my rent and avoid eviction.
Don't think that I have not been trying to get things together here. I have applied to well over 300 jobs in the past few months. I have been to very promising interviews that fizzled out shortly thereafter. I have also applied for payday loans, although if you see my earlier blog posting, they are low on my list of ways to get assistance. I am at the end of my rope. I need money for rent to avoid eviction, I need money for a car payment to avoid having my car repossessed, I need money to cover some meds that are needed today. Needless to say I am at my wits end.
I know that there are people around who could help me out without even batting an eyelash. I just don't know how to hook up with them. I am not good at asking for help as I have always been self-sufficient. Now that I find myself in need, I find that I don't even know where to go to find help.
Perhaps by putting my thoughts in writing and sending them out into the cosmos, I will get a badly needed response. Whether it is guidance or financial assistance, it would be greatly appreciated at this point, as I am desperate.

"Payday loans"

Ya know, I hear a lot of people talking about how payday loans are a rip-off and how they should be illegal. Well, I have to agree and disagree with that perspective.
Yes, I think they are a rip-off for the most part and they charge way too much in interest. Even for a very short term loan that is paid back quickly, it is way too much. However, I can see the necessity of payday loans, if they are not over used and if they are monitored. The latest problem I have seem come to the forefront related to payday loans is this campaign to get you to apply to multiple lenders. I have a major problem with this because the sites where you put in your information (everything including work and checking account info) gather the information and give you the hope that they will screen it and send you to a lender ready to approve the loan. Instead of doing that, they present you with perhaps five other "lenders" who request all the same information again. Should you enter it all a second time, you will again be directed down to five more lenders to apply. It is just an ongoing cascade in which you have put out your information in good faith, only to have it be for a advertising agency that is not even passing the information on!?!
The question then becomes, who is seeing this information? Is it really necessary to have all that information before you pass it along to someone else who will screen it? Is it really necessary to ask if I want to sign up for credit cards or auto loans?
Let's face it, if you are in the position where you are looking seriously at a payday loan online, you are in a bit of a spot (to say the least!) Providing your information to someone who can actually say "yes" or "no" is what you are looking for, not this endless maze of information entering that goes on to fill up your spam folder for the next three weeks and leaves you with dozens of voice mail messages telling you to "go to our website, as you have been preapproved for another loan" when they never approved you in the first place!
The internet is a wonderful thing and the ability to communicate instantly, find out whether you can get a loan in minutes...these are all great things. But those groups that capitalize on the needs of others have got to be put in their place. And really, it isn't even those who use these loans who need to speak up about it (although they have a great voice, I am sure!) but the legitimate direct lenders who have a web presence and want to loan money to others.
Now, I understand there should be room for everyone and we should all be able to play together, but there is also a necessity to play fair. Taking people who are already at the point of desperation through an endless maze of applications should be illegal.
So, the moral of this is..if you ever find yourself in a position to utilize a payday loan, don't just type "payday loan" in your search engine. Type in "Payday loan direct lender" and you will have at least a fair shot at getting the funds you need.

Positive light

I did get a call for yet another interview, and it went well. I have since been called back for a second interview, but it may not be until the end of next week (so that all pertinent parties can be present). But, it is a step forward - and I am certainly grateful for that.
On the money front, I still need about $2000 as quickly as possible. I need to get the rent covered and a car payment. I have some funds coming in in the next week, but it won't be nearly enough to cover it. Needless to say, I pray a lot.
All I can do is to keep plugging along - it's all I know how to do.
When I had moved, I has an offer for a free gas card - turns out it wasn't so much a card as a rebate program. Not quite what I had expected, but something to follow through on. It may take a while longer than I had anticipated, but I need gas anyway, so I may as well take advantage of the rebates.
Little glimmers of positive light from down a dark road....

Disheartening

It's very disheartening to sit here and realize that even after getting an education I am no better off now, than I was thirty years ago.
I know this is a temporary thing. I know that something great will come along soon. I just can't help but wonder, at this point in time, what this pursuit was all about? I mean, I know that part of my problem is the economy, but that is only a part - which means there is a greater part to make up the whole of this situation.
I was always told that if you got a good education, you could get any job you wanted. Well I have seen a lot lately that I wanted, and I have applied for them - even been interviewed in very few cases - but I am still primarily unemployed. And this thing about people saying they will call you - when did all that start? I understand that I am competing with others for jobs, but potential employers should at least tell you when they will be making a decision. If you tell me that you need someone by next week, then I can at least anticipate a call about whether that someone is me or not. That brings me to the other thing - calling. In this age of technology, would it be so horrid to take some time to contact those people who applied and let them know whether they are being considered for the position? I think employers need to be up front about whether you are even a viable candidate for a position. Let me know and then I can move forward!
Anyway, these are today's rants. I'm sure things will get better - at least on the job front. Money is another matter all together and when I think of the people who have a ton of it and those of us who have none of it, it just depresses me. I just need to get together two thousand dollars to get ahead. I know people who can spend that in one weekend on frivolous stuff - I just need it to pay bills. If I could get that much together and get my bills current, my checks would keep me current in the future. I just got caught short with having to move and the costs involved in that, so now I am in this permanent state of "behind" on everything. I just need enough to break even and begin paying my bills on time. Once I get to that point, I know I will be able to keep them up to date.

Employer "Assessment"

What are they looking for anyway? I have been called a number of times with the hope of getting a position, only ti have to take an "assessment". I take the assessment, answer honestly, and end up not "passing". I don't understand how you can pass (or not pass) something that is asking inherently personal values questions.
Anyway, it looks as though I have not passed the latest of those (taken today) and I will be going in to another agency tomorrow to take yet another. Hopefully, this one will be more meaningful (typing speed, etc) and quantifiable.
As for today, well, just chalk it up to experience, I guess. Another hopeful day shot down.

Mixed Blessing??

Interestingly, after posting yesterday, I got a call for an interview. Something to look forward to although it is in a different field, but I am adaptable and if this is a good fit, then it will be.
Today, however, I got a call from my part time job. Since they are cutting hours across the board, they said that I dont' have to come in today.
Whiel I really don't mind (I have plenty to do here!) I hope that the hours go to someone who needs them.
Finally decided to continue with the unpacking. I'll have to pay the rent later today, so I should at least unpack. Still wondering how I am going to cover this all.
Money worries are never ending.

Current crises

I never thought I would be out of work for so long. At most, I figured a couple of months..nice vacation...get some things done. But, now I am entering the ninth month of this and it is worse than being pregnant!

At least with pregnancy, there is an ending in sight.

Not so with this.

My resume is all over the place. I have two different versions wandering about on the web. I have applied to heaven only knows how many jobs (it is in the 500+ ballpark!) and only had three interviews!?! Something is wrong there.

I know, you're going to say, "Well, the economy..."

That can't be the only explanation. I realize that hundreds of people are applying for the very same jobs I apply for, but come on...at least one of them must be interested enough to at least call and have me interview! But no.

So, here I sit, cell phone at the ready waiting for "that" call, web browser open, just in case they contact me via e-mail.

I've got a college degree - two in fact and working on a third. So it can't be education related. I have a steady work history - seven plus years at my last job. I even took a part time position in retail so that I could keep my hand in and not look like I didn't want to work.

I did all the right things, yet here I am.

I ended up having to move, lost the apartment I had been in for five and a half years because I couldn't pay the rent. I am facing losing my car because I can't make the payments. Don't even know if I will be able to continue with my education after the summer because I will have used up all my student loan monies.